things to think about

today i am thinking abt: tall vgl hotel fun
November 18, 2009, 10:32 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

So I am travelling for work right now, at this huge conference that honestly has been feeling daunting. I am used to movement conferences with hoodies and t shirts, not dress conferences with prime rib and art installations. It’s been ridiculous.

The best way to cope with this, of course, is to do what my people have done best for years: find the gay mafia. It took me all day Monday, but finally I found a few homosexual men to say hello to and trade conference tips. I am in a pretty lucky place for this conference, in that talking about my job requires me to be pretty out (“we are a social justice foundation that supports lgbti groups working for social change”), and I am rather visible in the context of fundraising fashion. So I made some homo man friends, and they’ve hooked me up: getting me into the fancy reception, having fun playing erotic photo hunt, and turning me on to something I never would have considered: conference ass.

Friends, Romans, countrymen, thanks to the 21st century, I bring you Craigslist.

See, this conference is huge. I am not sure how many people are here but let’s just say a crapload. We are a huge block of people in each of three or four hotels, each of which I believe sold out their conference space. And evidently, say the faggeaux, there are some folks who are using craigslist to see if they can’t take better advantage of their large hotel bed and clean hotel sheets than, say, I am.

Craigslist does this thing where links expire. So rather than linking, I am going to quote. I also have some difficulties about what happens when you expose secret cultures to the light of day, even when the light of day is still the relatively private venue of this blog; sorry pals. You’ll just have to trust me on this.

Here we go: the secret underbelly of the conference I will not name. (Why blow up someone’s spot?):

Laid back visitor to char. Looking for Jo buddy. Can host or travel. Role play…Jo/oral. Hit me back with stats and info about yourself. Glwm/5’11/160#

MWM, 42 in town Monday night for one night. In hotel by outlet mall and looking to have some man on man fun later that night. 5’10”, blue eyes, brown hair, hairy chest and 165. Looking for a wm my age or younger. Into body contact, sucking, nipple play and if chemistry is good, there will be more. If interested send me your stats and if you have one, a picture. Looking for after 8 pm monday night.

you needing 3 your 3 cock sucked,,,,,6,,,,like to 3 blow a 1 load 2 all over 3 my 1 chest,,,3,,,,oral bear type 6 botom here,,,,,msg me

white male here wanting your load, now !!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Any hot men out there vgl 5’9″165 hairy pecs legs, hit me up

Masculine, fit, discreet professional visiting on business… like to meet similar for mutual play and fun…. discreet, masculine, fit only…five feet nine inches 42chest32waist… get into hot, man to man, body contact, stroking, kissing, sucking, rimming if clean… ddf here and expect the same…Reply with stats, interests, and pic…. discreet and laid back is given and expected… just two buddies having fun….

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Please note that this is not even opening the Adam4Adam bucket.

So this conference I have been at is — how do you put it — straight. Really straight. Not intensely overbearingly straight, but really straight. It’s a lot of huge organizations, development staff is generally speaking somewhat more conservative…you get the gist. I have felt fine at it, but definitely like something of an outlier. And here I come to find that there is an underbelly of gay sex pulsing right below my fingertips (figuratively speaking.) Some of these ads were at my very hotel – AS WE SPEAK there could be gays fucking. It thrills the voyeur in me that some of the men I might ride down in the elevator with are straightening their tie because it got loose sucking cock.

I’m not one of those people who gets mad that these guys are being discreet/not all identifying as gay. I know, I know, OUT PROUD WELL ENDOWED, it’s almost 2010, come out come out wherever you are. I don’t think you have to identify as gay to have gay sex and I can understand how some folks who might want to identify as gay just don’t feel like they can make the hard choices that can sometimes require. It’s not on me to dictate how someone else lives their life. (Provided they aren’t being anti-gay hypocrites — I’m looking at you, Larry Craig.) I am comforted, though, by knowing that underneath this veneer of professional professional suit suit suit, there are real people too.

Last night my mom called me again (like she does sometimes) totally out of her mind (like she is sometimes.) I was at an event for high-level clients that I snuck into thanks to the gay mafia, and I answered probably — to be honest — because I had had too much to drink. And as she started wailing and gnashing her teeth and all this, all I could think was dear god, not HERE. Not here in professional land where we’re all FINE and OKAY and GOOD THANKS. Not here while I’m wearing a jacket and meeting people. Everyone at these conferences is so FINE and OKAY and GOOD THANKS — maybe we’re tired, but with the eyeroll and shrug that means “that’s just because I am so busy and important and you know, the last time I wasn’t tired was 1993.” Being a professional means pretending you don’t have an animal self. The MLA had a panel on conference sex, and it is hard to find other written references but I know people joke about it — I just have to admit that I haven’t seen it. (Maybe I don’t know what it looks like when straight people are cruising each other for a little discreet fun?)

So I am comforted that something as public as Craigslist is blowing up my illusions of everyone as highly slick professionals at all times. I am comforted by the reminder that we are all people under our suits and collared shirts. I am comforted by the reminder that things are not what they seem, and especially that this conference is not as cleanly heterosexual as it appears. I hope all those ads got it on — maybe with each other — maybe in the room next to mine. Here in the South, where I have been expecting to be marginalized, I have to remember that things are often queerer than they seem.


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i had gay conference sex at the big hillel conference a few years back, when i was working for a large jewish nonprofit and my co-conspirator was a hillel staff person. (to clarify, she and i had a bit of a history: it was not a random pickup or craiglist-facilitated endeavor.) it felt good subverting that also Very Straight zone, but i got the sense that we were not alone – and i think the conference planners knew it, with all the late-night alcohol-providing activities. i bet they were thinking about the jewish babies of the future.

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